the love of God

as it turns out, i don't have much going on in my head to write; but, since i told myself i'd make it a point to, here i am. i guess since i've gotten out of the habit, this blank screen is a little more intimidating than it used to be, but i'll get past it.

the only meaningful thought i have today is this: the love of God really overwhelms me.it's unfathomable to me how He loves me, but He does. and it's proven to me time and time again in not only His grace and mercy for me but also in His justice. He never lets me get away with something for too long without calling me out on it. it's heartwrenchingly painful. let's not even pretend like it's not. sometimes it makes me want to bury my head in my pillow and my tears and not come back into the world for a day or two... or twenty. but it's in the pain and the doubt and the lessons and the hard conversations that i'm being transformed. i don't want to be like me anymore. i want to be like Jesus... selfless and so in love with people. i'm just so thankful He hasn't given up on me yet.

the only love that won't disappoint you is one that won't change, that can't be lost, that is not based on the ups and downs of life or how well you live. it is something that not even death can take away from you. God's love is the only thing like that. 

Keller